Thank you, thank you, thank you for this. I’m 59 and this not only answers so many questions, but feels absolutely empowering to live fully on my own terms and enjoy the hell out of it.
Love this article and to all you "youngsters" out there in your 40s-50s-60s - I'm jealous. You are about to enter "warp speed" in those aging numbers. Enjoy any and all things you can now and don't get "stuck". When you see it isn't working for you - turn some pages. Somehow I am 73 years old - I really don't know how and a survivor of Stage 3 uterine cancer diagnosed at age 69. I feel I lost decades to my third marriage that began when I was 35 and at the top of "game" in so many ways - oh my how I loved that girl. I let her go without enough background checks and kept thinking I had more time to "correct" things. Then life continued to happen and I became complacent and this article makes SO much sense to me in hindsight. Thank you!
I love this! I’m 53 and in the thick of this second puberty. Thanks for putting into words what so many women don’t speak of. Can’t wait until my gray brain matter recovers.
This is the second of your articles I have read (and shared). Pretty sure most women will agree with me when I say you are a Godsend!! Question though: does HRT PREVENT the outcome you describe??? Since it supplies estrogen… how does that work (I’m on HRT but what you describe resonates big nonetheless).
I spent 3 years off work from burn out. I recently went back to work (in a job that I used to do in my 20’s and 30’s) in July and made it until January.
My body stopped me before my brain did- got so sick. The gift of that was having time to rest and heal and listen to what my soul was screaming! This is NOT who you are anymore, Terra! All I could think was, I need the time and space to shed the old me and birth the one that has no capacity for bullshit, rushing, hustling, grinding and doing something just because,
A. Im good at it
B. I make good money doing it
It doesn’t matter anymore. I’ll be 50 in a month and the mental, emotional and physical shifts I am feeling are so liberating- I just need to keep listening.
This is such a relief to read. I just turned 55 and slowly I’d been experiencing a lot of the things you mention. Last week i woke up early, booked a cab and booked a flight on the way to the airport to take my first solo trip to an Arts Biennale without a return ticket. I felt more alive and happy in those 5 days than i did in a decade. Thank you for posting this and for all the comments. It is so reassuring.
What an absolutely wonderful post! For me, it's dinner. Can't. Even. Think. About. Dinner. I don't want to plan it, buy for it, prepare it, or even eat it. I've fucking done with dinner.
I’m not overachieving so that the people around me can underachieve any longer. This characteristic seems admirable and employs great applause but it’s not conducive to a happy, well balanced life.
I'm 69, but this process started for me at 39 when I was diagnosed with a rare and aggressive form of cervical cancer and had "about 30 days to live." The process you describe is exactly what I went through. It was harrowing for a very long time. But the rewards on the back end have been stunning. Peace and joy and clarity and authenticity beyond words.
Thank you so much! Every woman after 45 should read this to deeply understand: all is good
It is terrible to witness that so many women feel wrong insufficient not important to the world anymore. Such a drastic drop of self worth and self confidence.
Recovering people-pleaser here, early forties, approaching peri fast and furiously...add in a late-in-life ADHD diagnosis and this girl's brain is literally on fire...it's wild to see and feel and watch it all burn down around you...excited to see what rises from the ashes:)
Thank you, thank you, thank you for this. I’m 59 and this not only answers so many questions, but feels absolutely empowering to live fully on my own terms and enjoy the hell out of it.
Every.Single.Word of this resonated with me. Thank you!
I feel like I'm going through this and I'm 43! 😳🤣😎
Love this article and to all you "youngsters" out there in your 40s-50s-60s - I'm jealous. You are about to enter "warp speed" in those aging numbers. Enjoy any and all things you can now and don't get "stuck". When you see it isn't working for you - turn some pages. Somehow I am 73 years old - I really don't know how and a survivor of Stage 3 uterine cancer diagnosed at age 69. I feel I lost decades to my third marriage that began when I was 35 and at the top of "game" in so many ways - oh my how I loved that girl. I let her go without enough background checks and kept thinking I had more time to "correct" things. Then life continued to happen and I became complacent and this article makes SO much sense to me in hindsight. Thank you!
I love this! I’m 53 and in the thick of this second puberty. Thanks for putting into words what so many women don’t speak of. Can’t wait until my gray brain matter recovers.
This is the second of your articles I have read (and shared). Pretty sure most women will agree with me when I say you are a Godsend!! Question though: does HRT PREVENT the outcome you describe??? Since it supplies estrogen… how does that work (I’m on HRT but what you describe resonates big nonetheless).
The corporate grind. Byyyyeeee.
I spent 3 years off work from burn out. I recently went back to work (in a job that I used to do in my 20’s and 30’s) in July and made it until January.
My body stopped me before my brain did- got so sick. The gift of that was having time to rest and heal and listen to what my soul was screaming! This is NOT who you are anymore, Terra! All I could think was, I need the time and space to shed the old me and birth the one that has no capacity for bullshit, rushing, hustling, grinding and doing something just because,
A. Im good at it
B. I make good money doing it
It doesn’t matter anymore. I’ll be 50 in a month and the mental, emotional and physical shifts I am feeling are so liberating- I just need to keep listening.
I cannot tolerate grown women being called "girls".
This is such a relief to read. I just turned 55 and slowly I’d been experiencing a lot of the things you mention. Last week i woke up early, booked a cab and booked a flight on the way to the airport to take my first solo trip to an Arts Biennale without a return ticket. I felt more alive and happy in those 5 days than i did in a decade. Thank you for posting this and for all the comments. It is so reassuring.
What an absolutely wonderful post! For me, it's dinner. Can't. Even. Think. About. Dinner. I don't want to plan it, buy for it, prepare it, or even eat it. I've fucking done with dinner.
I’m not overachieving so that the people around me can underachieve any longer. This characteristic seems admirable and employs great applause but it’s not conducive to a happy, well balanced life.
I'm 69, but this process started for me at 39 when I was diagnosed with a rare and aggressive form of cervical cancer and had "about 30 days to live." The process you describe is exactly what I went through. It was harrowing for a very long time. But the rewards on the back end have been stunning. Peace and joy and clarity and authenticity beyond words.
Thank you so much! Every woman after 45 should read this to deeply understand: all is good
It is terrible to witness that so many women feel wrong insufficient not important to the world anymore. Such a drastic drop of self worth and self confidence.
I will share your text to as many women possible.
Thank you for this. X
This sounds like being neurodivergent at any age, as a woman. Similar physiology at play.
Recovering people-pleaser here, early forties, approaching peri fast and furiously...add in a late-in-life ADHD diagnosis and this girl's brain is literally on fire...it's wild to see and feel and watch it all burn down around you...excited to see what rises from the ashes:)